Moving Forward

Many of us get tired of trying when we have not been successful in achieving our targets past. We, therefore, choose to stay in our comfort zone; in jobs we do not like, with people who hate us and in physically and emotionally abusive relationships – simply paralysed by the fear of being and failing alone.

We do this despite knowing that there is nothing impossible. There is the same chance of success and failure all things being equal and we can increase the chances of success just as we do failure, if we do not try.

Moving out of such a cycle takes a lot. First thing first, one ought to commit to doing anything in her power to think and act differently. Where there is a will there is a way.

Getting rid of negative habits helps. Some things that can make one not move ahead include anger, bitterness, unforgiveness, and all manner of negative emotions. Acknowledging these negative traits helps with planning and understanding the skills and abilities one wants to develop. Then, building a roadmap of what needs to achieved would be easy. The journey could even be started. Of course, it does not mean everything will work according to plan, but there at least will be a starting point.

It is hard to know to go without an effective analysis of where one is. A simple analysis of the current position will help synchronise thoughts, and then see how the past could be left to the future. This, however, takes a serious task of thinking.

Many people get stuck in analysis paralysis. Even when there is no clarity, it is better to have a direction. Moving forward takes moving away from any situation that keeps one in the same place, be it mentally, emotionally or physically.

Focus on the present and the opportunities its presents is vital too. Life is seasonal and whatever phase one find herself in, it is just passing by.

Changing what needs to change now is important. This not only helps us to see the future, but it also helps us to learn from others. But why does looking at others matter?

Scanning the environment is crucial to make thoughtful decision on how best to move forward. The bigger the dream, the bigger the challenges. As social animals, we are part of a bigger society. We live in the world of relatives. Hence, our success often has a societal dimension.

Different things help us renew our minds so we can think and dream bigger dreams for ourselves. These may include making new friends or reaching out to the people we would like to be like. Reading books and opening up our minds to a different way of thinking and being, and moving from a confining environment are all enabling. Research has shown we earn in the range of 30pc of our friends income. So one more thing to do may be to improve the quality of friends one has, what one reads and where one hangs out.

Further, people who are looking to achieve the same goal(s) or bigger help us keep focused. We have to learn to manage the challenges of life without letting them keep us down. Hanging out with like-minded people; people who have achieved what we want to achieve – support groups, for instance, keep us from looking back, while helping us understand our situation. They also help us learn to forgive ourselves.

In all this, it is important to realise life is not fair. Others in the same position may have it easier than oneself or may never have had to face the situation one is in. We all have or may have had windfalls in life we did not deserve. Life has seasons and we need to embrace the season we are in as it is an opportunity to be better.

A point to note is that often our fears are much bigger than reality and even in a truly bad situation we have the strength to go through much more than we imagine. Often our biggest fears actually do not manifest so we are better off not feeding the thought and paralysing any actions in a positive direction.

 

 


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